excerpts from my autobiography

my mother raised me to be retrospective.

but this blog is about periods and cats.

This is what my relationship with my boss is like.

Also my entire branch is obsessed with UK bra sizing (30F here, guys!).

Wednesday night with my possessed cat and other animals.

It’s Saturday night and my dad is over to watch the basketball game with J and all I want to be is in bed.



Kitestring is a simple webapp that checks up on you and sends a text message to your emergency contacts if you don’t respond by a designated time.

Enter your ETA and Kitestring will send you a text message to reply to. You can extend your check in time via SMS or check in early. If you don’t respond to Kitestring’s text message, your emergency contact(s) will get your customizable alert message. [x]


(via thecactuswhereyourheartshouldbe)

if patrons would give me more giftcards to bojangles and starbucks and less pamphlets about jesus, I would be much obliged.

can I call in sick because I forgot to do laundry?

J took this wonderful pic of me sleeping because, like, my cat isn’t allowed on the bed anymore but I think he thinks that if he isn’t technically touching the mattress it’s ok.

I had a dream that my mom and I were attacked by a serial killer but we managed to get away and as we’re running down the street I see a Sizzler’s and say we should go in to call the cops, and my mom’s just like, “Oh no, isn’t there somewhere local near here we could pop in to? I want to support local businesses.”



Remember when I met Drake @ the Tucson mall tho?